Splitting from your spouse is challenging at any age, but couples who are part of the grey divorce boom often struggle more than most because of the unique challenges that come with a separation later in life.
According to Statistics Canada, this country’s divorce rate has been on a downward trajectory for the last three decades: while roughly 13 out of every 1,000 married people divorced each year in the early 1990s, that figure was down by more than half in 2020 — the most recent year for which data is available – to just 5.6 in every 1,000.
Only one age group bucked the overall trend: the over-50s, where the divorce rate increased over the same period. Meanwhile, the average age at divorce for men and women combined has risen steadily from around 38 to 46 years during that time.
Grey divorce dynamics
It’s not entirely clear what is driving these changes, but in my practice, I have noticed that grey divorces tend to break down mainly into two distinctive groups.
The first type is a very long-term marriage that breaks down after decades, often when the couple reaches retirement or after all their children have left home.
This can be an emotionally difficult time for former partners adjusting to a new identity as a single person, especially for those who relied heavily on their spouse to tend to the health of their finances or their social life during the marriage.
In these cases, the advanced age of the parties may mean that some larger values are attached to their shared assets, but it doesn’t tend to add much complexity to the property division process.
Once the appropriate property has been identified and valued, Ontario’s Family Law Act makes the division calculation relatively straightforward, entitling each spouse to an equal share in property accumulated between the dates of marriage and separation, subject to certain deductions and exceptions. An equalization payment from the spouse whose assets grew more during the marriage makes up any difference.
Blended families
Things get considerably messier in the second big group of grey divorces: blended family splits involving couples who re-partnered after earlier marital or common-law unions.
Since the parties’ offspring are typically grown up, parenting time and child support is not an issue couples in these cases usually have to worry about. However, adult children can still be a source of tension during a split, with each side seeking to preserve as much property as possible so they can pass it on to their beneficiaries in their estate.
I’ve written about the value of family law contracts for couples of all ages, but the case for a marriage or cohabitation agreement is even stronger for parents and grandparents who find love at the second or third attempt later in life.
An experienced family lawyer can craft an agreement that takes into consideration the unique needs and wishes of elderly couples, reducing the chances of a contentious dispute should they decide to part ways in the future. Contracts could be used to formalize the parties’ plan to keep their property separate, forgo a claim for support or outline their intentions regarding specific assets, including real estate.
If you want your family law contract to stand the test of time (or judicial scrutiny), you need to ensure the proper process is followed before you each sign your names to it. Full and frank financial disclosure is a must for both parties, and it’s essential for each of you to take independent legal advice before executing the document.
Divorce is one of the most stressful events a person will ever go through, but you don’t have to navigate it alone. Contact me to schedule a consultation and take the first step towards a brighter chapter in your life.